Wednesday, 15 October 2008

alice's quilt...


After Alice was born and died I came home from hospital lost, sad and panicked. I didn't know whether to sit or stand or to run or scream. Amongst the million thoughts going through my mind I knew that I had to make something for our baby girl. Alice missed out on the handmade clothes, the bibs, the appliqued tee-shirts and the little blankets for her dolls and bears. She missed out on my terrible knitting, my printing and my not so neat embroidery.

The need to make her a quilt was overwhelming - I had to make her something. So I came home and did just that. I went up to my sewing room, carefully picking out fabric that meant something to me and to us and carefully cut my squares. I am generally a speed sewer but this time I was careful and pressed all my seams and lined up all my joins and was as neat as I could be.

I chose the Japanese double gauze for the inside as it felt like a babies muslin. Something that should be close to her skin.

I appliqued some mementos on the inside - some things that would be close to her, some things that had been close to us.

I worked on the quilt, hand binding it the next morning and finishing it throughout the day. I took it back to the hospital. I went to see our baby again to wrap her in this gift that I made. I wrapped Alice in the quilt with a small bear my mother made for me many years ago.

In some unexplainable way I felt calmer. I wanted her to be safe and warm and not to be alone.

Some of the fabric was new, some was vintage and some was recycled. There were stories in the fabric and they would keep her safe.

15 comments:

Nikki said...

What a beautiful gift from a loving mother.

CurlyPops said...

That was such a lovely thing to do.

Jessica said...

That quilt will be loved and cherished for such a long time. What a great way to weave love together for Alice.

tiff said...

Little Alice.

A specail quilt made for an extra special baby girl.

You do what you can to nurture, to show how much you love them. I still do little things.

E and T said...

Rach, after reading your post I have tears running down my face. My heart aches for you and your family.

A truly "beauty full" gift of love.

Love and hugs
Elise

Jo said...

That's a beautiful quilt Rach.

Amber said...

Such a lovely gesture,
Hope you guys are holding up and hope you are ok.

Take care

Brierley & Clover said...

What a beautiful thing to do for your little Alice - you're a wonderful Mum x

Erna said...

So brave of you to sew for your little girl at that time...The idea that she is wrapped in your handmade quilt will comfort you forever. You're a great mum.

Jenny said...

What a wonderful thing you did for your wee one. You can remember her wrapped warmly in it.

jodi said...

quilts are ultimately made to hold memories...I hope your memories are stitched in tight.

Poppy and Mei said...

Beautiful Rach...just like Alice, I'm sure...XXxx

potty mouth mama said...

Couldn't be more perfect for your little Alice. Beautiful memories for your baby girl.

ingrid said...

What an amazing loving mother you are. Thanks for sharing such precious details.

Juddie said...

What a beautiful, moving post. My thoughts are with you and your little girl.